dRiN's life!

Thu, 24 Jul 2008 16:57:58 GMT

i dunno what to say
i dunno what to do
did my very best to do what i can do
all i get was getting myself hurt
your words pierce thru my heart
they are so heavy that my heart sank
i am speechless

Tue, 22 Jul 2008 17:22:49 GMT

i think i've let my parents down by doing this.
but it takes alot of courage to do this.
for all that i've done, all my sins, all my misdeeds..
i apologise for every mistakes that i've commited!

all i want is YOU!
i might not have the chance to be with you anymore,
but hope you'll take care of yourself and study hard.

dad and mum, thanks for everything you have gave me. for tolerating me! i love you..
goes to my both sisters! thanks alot. though i find you all quite irritating at times!

sister hannah.. i really miss you!

bye people!

Tue, 22 Jul 2008 15:14:37 GMT

times have changed
dedications are meaningless
do you still enjoy listening to dedications i made for you?

aiya fuck ah!
why am i so fucking emo?
why am i so persistent?
why am i asking it for myself?
fuck ah!

Tue, 22 Jul 2008 14:58:32 GMT

i do whatever i can
just hope that you appreciate it
i am already trying my very best
at times i felt so demoralise
at times i felt like giving up
but im not going to give up!
hope everything will be fine for you!
take care..

Mon, 21 Jul 2008 14:19:41 GMT

i have not done well in school.
i screwed up lots of things.
nothing seems to be going right for me.
i wish i have a support,
someone who is there to motivate me,
someone that makes me wanna work real hard!
i am trying my best already,
but i think i've not fully utilise my potential!
i am going to do my best!

exam is on 10th October!
i die die gotta pass! who wanna stay up all night at airport with me? haha

Wed, 16 Jul 2008 13:56:59 GMT

my whole body is so weak recently, i think i can't take it anymore.
it really feels very bad, one after another.
so many things to worry about
school, health, relationship..
im too tired for everything!
can i just shut myself from this world?
life goes on, everything still has to be solve!

is there anything i can do
to regain your trust
your love
your everything?
i really miss you.

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 16:47:54 GMT

today is my birthday
nothing much ah
it's just like some other day
nothing special, maybe bcos it's a weekday
met up with kim for dinner
then off to mc cafe,she bought me a slice of cake
they don't provide candle, so she went breadtalk to buy another cake
she is the only one that sung me a birthday song on my bday
im so happy! i got it on video.

oreo cheesecake and latte

familiar bus ride, but different feelings

latte is her favourite!

some photos during my chalet:

ashton, brothers since poly year 1

john lee with his kuku face, my assistant director

ben, logger! he got drunk that night.. damn jialat!

david with his stupid kuku victory sign!

andrew

opps! me and bronson's gay pic :/

my classmates!

sandy

me, dada, wesley(autistic), la-rinaaaaaaa

me and my classmates!

ashton's brother!

me and john

cherlyn sleeping.. not feeling well! take care eh

samantha see pei pei!

kim's candid photo

someone i yearn for..

me and kian pong

me and andrew

preparations for my bday cake!

my birthday cake! what a birthday cake eh?

i really see the cake until i am stunned!

drinks for the night!! hahaha..
baccardi from bronson
appletini, martell cordon bleu from davis
3 absolut from aldrin
1 more absolut not here by ah yuan!

red wine from meiting!

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 09:58:50 GMT

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALDRIN!

Mon, 14 Jul 2008 13:12:45 GMT

i will give you all the time in the world to think and sort out everything
i will wait for you patiently
if there's anything i can do
please let me know
i'll do my very best to feel loved
it's not easy to treat you good
do all the little stuffs to make your day
many many surprises
i really miss you!

i am sick again.. sigh!
i am sick when my bday is tmr!
what the fuck..

Sun, 13 Jul 2008 15:37:42 GMT

foood can really make me happy!
but not that happy afterall!
sigh.
today i really had lots of great foooooood!

1st stop: Marina Mandarin
we had dim sum buffet.. i really ate alot, and the food was goood. especially the porridge! and alot of their dim sum have prawn, it's so fresh. and it's so nice to eat it while it's hot. (: and it's not very expensive anyway!

2nd stop: Wisma Atrium (Bakerzin)
I had strawberry shortcake, warm chocolate cake with ice cream, caramel eclair, iced chocolate! i eat here and ther, share share ma! hahaha.. the cakes are really gooood.. all of you should go try!! (:

3rd stop: Arab Street
I had shisha at amirah's grill first, then off to a moroccan restaurant for dinner.. i had tagine lamb, it's very nice! if you guys wanna try, lemme know! i shall bring you guys there to eat.. it's not very expensive! (:

but what im short of is a companion!
when i went for my lunch with my family..
my dad and mum, both sis with their boyfriend!
IM ALONE! everyone walk together..
i just find myself walking alone, left and right also nobody!
it's quite fucked up ah..

it's all my fault
i brought this upon myself
why am i complaining?
really wish you are with me!

11th July 2008

Sat, 12 Jul 2008 03:37:48 GMT

the chalet was fantastic.
i had my work friends (RITZ), my camp friends (LOGGERS!), my classmates (Lufthansa Technical Training Centre Singapore), my ex-classmates (M616)!
thanks everyone for coming..

special thanks to ashton, kian pong and david for the contributions to the chalet!

thanks to:
john lee for sponsoring some funds too!
karmen for the cake!
bronson for the baccardi!
davis for the martell cordon bleu and the appletini and rock glasses!
meiting for the wyndham estate cabernet merlot, vintage 2001!
ah yuan for the absolut peach!
dada, wesley, rina, glenda, joel for the g-shock watch plus the free gift from g-shock!
rehan, abelin, rebecca, lewis for the volcom t-shirt and the canvas paint 'container'!
rehan for the AB solder!
jeremy and sandy for the starbucks voucher!

someone very important to thank!
that is...... lil miss HANNAH!
her mum and younger sis came to pass me my present, really didn't expect them to come down just to pass me the present. really very paiseh sia! hahaha. but thanks alot! thank you auntie, and hannah younger sis for coming! thanks for the present too.. sister, i really miss you sia!

thanks to everyone that came!
and the list goes:
ashton
kianpong
david
kim
cherlyn
see pei pei
bronson
karmen
sandy
jeremy
joel
rebecca
lewis
rehan
abelin
meiting
dada
larrina
wesley
ah lim
andrew
alex
john lee
adrian
ashorie
wei long
hui xin
kian wee
jie wen
shaik
ah yuan
ah teng
yun cherng
clarence
zhi hao
eugene
samuel
ashton's brother
hannah's mother
hannah's younger sister

i really can't think anymore.. my mind is totally gone already! haha.. sorry if your name is not mentioned above! but im very thankful for all your presence!

the ice cream
i asked someone to specially buy for you
you forgotten about it
the seal is still tight
you never even eat one mouth
i thought you will open and share it with me and everyone
i was damn shocked to find it in the freezer and it is not yet open somemore
i fucking left it there
though i said i will keep for you
but sorry, im really very.......
and i told you already you can't drink
then why you still go and drink?
then end up you look so dead
i really don't wish to see you like that
why do this to yourself?
i really got nothing to say already
you SHUT me up
all i can do is to wait for you
I WILL WAIT FOR YOU!!!!

Thu, 10 Jul 2008 14:54:24 GMT

tmr is my chalet.
im celebrating my bday in advance.
as i've got plans on my actual day! (:

im bringing 3 bottles of absolut: citron, mandarin and mango!
it's part of my collection.. and it's time to finish all 3 bottles that i have..
davis is bringing a bottle of wine.
and im still considering whether to bring my sis's baileys or midori. haha!

tmr is like a gathering for me..
catch up with lots of people that i've not seen for a long time.
i just wish to have lots of fun tmr.
and to keep myself awake as long as possible.

offfff to bed!!! goooooooodnight people..

Wed, 09 Jul 2008 10:54:34 GMT

last night i couldn't sleep at all
my nose is so damn irritating
end up sleeping at 4+
this morning when i woke up
my head hurts alot
didn't go school, but i had my rest (:
had lunch with ashton
then home sweet home

it's hard not to be sad
the radio played 1 of your favourite song
you heard the song, but not the message
what else can i say?
count myself unlucky!

Mon, 07 Jul 2008 13:26:48 GMT

the days are near
i want to be the luckiest person on earth
to be with you
it's the most beautiful thing
let me enjoy every single moment
every second will be like a month to me

Sun, 06 Jul 2008 16:04:18 GMT

yesterday went out with her, accompanied her to send her phone for servicing.
then lunched at yoshinoya.
off to singtel to settle her caller id problem.
took bus to thomson plaza starbucks.
sat there listening to songs, many stuffs in my mind.
until i really couldn't take it that i spat every single thing out.
honestly i do feel better after that, and very sorry to make you cry.
really appreciate everything you have done for me.
the talk was great, the company was great!
i really love it.. especially when im leaving! haha.

off to dinner with my family and relatives.
it was my grandma's birthday!
food wasn't that goooood, maybe too used to ritz food?
hahaha.
and everyone was like asking me about my hair or my foot..
and there's 1 fucking aunt pushed my head, and talked to me with her fucking attitude.
she asked me in cantonese, why you dye your hair like that? very nice meh?
i was pissed bcos she fucking pushed my head, she's not my mother or father..
who the fuck she think she is? i don't even know who the fuck she is..
she doesn't exist in my life, just another fucking bitch..
i seriously wanted to splash a glass of water at her face alr. bcos i was drinking at that time!
even if i see her next time i will give her back attitude.
you wanna play with me? fine! i shall fucking play with you..
i'll make sure you fucking get it from me!

then after dinner went to meet karmen and talk..
went to mcd to chat..
lotsa stuffs to talk ah, nvr ever gonna finish one!
then went home because i sensed that i've got a fever..

called her and talked to her for few hours..
i was struggling for like 2 hours?
i felt very 'xin ku', but i just couldn't bear to hang up..
really afraid that something might happen to her!
so i just talked to her until she felt much better then we went to bed..

today woke up at 11 plus..
settle some things for my bbq with ashton..
ate noodles today, bcos i can't go out to have lunch with my parents..
my bandage used finish alr, and my sis forgot to buy for me ytd.
so today im stucked at home!
and everyone in my house went out, except me!
i can't step out of the house, fear of getting infected!
i was damn bored!
then suddenly i thought of hannah, so i called her!
and we chat for awhile..
EVERYONE! LIL MISS HANNAH IS FINE! and she MISSES EVERYONE! (:

i already decided to wait for you,
i hope this wait will be worthwhile!
you really make me go crazy.
just can't get you out of my mind!
you are the first to many things in my life..
take care!
anything can always find me.. (:

Fri, 04 Jul 2008 16:09:35 GMT

You'll always be a part of me
I'm a part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
darling cause you'll always be my baby

maybe the feeling is not so strong anymore,
but i believe it still lingers in your heart!
you might have plans,
but you never know what lies ahead!
let me be the one to make you happy,
be the pillar you need,
be your punching bag,
be your listening ear,
let me have this chance k?

today was fine..
but not at night, after playing the swing..
all of a sudden i was sweating non-stop,
and my whole body was so weak,
i was giddy, feel like puking!
can't really walk in a straight line,
still feel like puking..
my friends told me that my face was very pale!
thanks davis for the lift,
and glenda for the advice!
and everyone for the concern! (:

going to bed already..
aldrin needs some rest! haha

Wed, 02 Jul 2008 12:42:16 GMT

i can't attend class today.
i got chased out!
sat at techno from 9.30 - 12.30, sit till my butt decomposing alr..
went home to change and off to marina square..
got a haircut, and coloured my hair!

hahahaha!!
not so siao to get that colour, though i like it! haha..

final product..
ash colour, and my highlight is temporary blue!
1 week later then the real colour will be revealed! so stay tuned!
catch it live, catch it first on drindrindrindrin channel! (:

thanks to karmen, ben and davis! xie xie.. terima kasih.. arigato.. merci..

Tue, 01 Jul 2008 14:01:55 GMT

i don't have mood today!
after lunch i went home, bcos i don't want to go back to school.
i don't know why but i just don't have the mood!
feeling so tired!
tomorrow is another boring day, and i don't think i will do anything in the workshop..
i found metal chips in my wound today! it's for real..
it's really in my wound! fuck..
and my heart sunk to the bottom of the ocean, i don't know why but im very sad when i see it..
it's my fault for working in the workshop for the past 2 days!
i don't know what to do in the workshop already..
if i continue doing my project, i might have more metal chips entering my wound.
if i don't do, i can't catch up with my work!

WHAT DO I DO NOW??

HEALTH or STUDIES?
health is an irreversible thing.. studies can be done some other time, but this course im having now is something i really like and i don't wish to take it again next time bcos it is a waste of time. if i finish now, it'll be much easier for me next time! if i continue to work in the workshop i might lose my foot? if it's really so serious! sigh.

when i needed you the most,
you are not here!
i think i really made a big mistake,
and i don't think things will favour me!

I'M GOING TO BLESS MYSELF TO RECOVER ASAP!
AND THAT I CAN HAVE A PEACEFUL SLEEP!
GOOOOODNIGHT ALDRIN! and to everyone i know.. (:

Mon, 30 Jun 2008 13:29:06 GMT

it's always here and there!
i already dunno what to do!
it's very tiring to always think!

i did drilling and riveting today. i just did workshop, the instructor gave me 2 option. 1, sit somewhere and rest the whole day; 2, continue doing my work at my own risk. i chose option 2, or else i'll be damn boring sitting there from 8.30am - 4pm! and true enough i know that somehow some metal chips will sure be around my bandage, i got to slowly remove it after that.. i am scared i can't catch up if i sit there and do nothing, and when i do i am afraid of the metal chips getting in! what should i do? can someone tell me what should i do?

today was a success.. i never touch a single stick, not even a puff! woohoooo.. i feel so happy for myself eh!! (: today is a new beginning to my healthy lifestyle eh! hahaha, hopefully i will succeed in quitting so when hannah is back she'll be super duper shocked! if i can really quit, many of you can quit also! I CAN SAVE ALOT OF MONEY! I CAN LIVE ON THIS EARTH A LIL LONGER! I AM ENVIRONMENTAL FRIENDLY! (: craps ah, but it's true.. many of you think i can't quit, and i shall prove it to you people! as long as i can not touch it next friday, im very safe! (:

shall have a good and early rest..
been sleeping very late for the past few nights.
and when i sleep i can't sleep well.
it's quite screwed up ah!

Sun, 29 Jun 2008 18:11:01 GMT

everything is just a misunderstanding.
everything starts with me.
im the cause for all these!
if i don't exist nothing will happen..

to you: you might hate me, but i don't bear any grudges. you hate me for a reason/reasons, and these reasons i started it so i won't deny and you have the right to dislike me. maybe we could have a talk! so i hope to see you at my bday chalet next friday.

this few days, i think i've screwed up many things.. my life, my friend's life, my buddy's life! i think i am really a failure, i can't do things properly nowadays. i dunno why also, think it's time for me to change! i shall make everyone around me HAPPY! im sorry to all that are in the picture for last night misunderstanding. if i am not at ritz, if i didn't go simpang nothing will happen.. so sorry to you people!

this week will be a boring week..
i am going school to sleep and write my log book..
bcos i can't do anything in the workshop.. sigh!

all i want now is another chance,
i hope i can get this chance,
i want to make it up to you!

Sat, 28 Jun 2008 09:21:25 GMT

today is a saturday, but it feels like a sunday to me!
i was so confused when i woke up just now.. really felt like a sunday!
think im not used to it, bcos saturday i usually work..
damn not used to it, but soon i will ah! haha..
going to have a hair cut this week! my bday month, i got discount! shiok shiok..

last night couldn't sleep..
slept at 5am..
hardly i can stay up till so late ah!
it's so torturing for me..
mentally, emotionally, physically!
im having all these at a go, how to handle?
im mentally unstable, emo now, my foot is bleeding like nobody's business!
FUCK IT!
everything is so screwed!

Fri, 27 Jun 2008 18:31:51 GMT

today the nurse removed my dressing, and we started counting the no. of holes i have on my feet..
let you all see a clearer picture ah!!

there are a total of 36 holes!
can you imagine there are 36 holes under my left foot! hahaha..

i miss lil miss hannah!! ahhhh..
i miss her crap, her laughter, her smile! ahhhhhh!!
some photos that we took at phuture that day!

hannah sister and me!! (:

SMILES! we are at wine bar..

sister and karmen.. i think karmen is abit seh seh alr! haha!

davis and miss hannah!

3 musketeer.. all the crappers!

me and bronson gaying below! omg, this is damn gay! hahaha..

the 3 of us just can't stop taking photos ah! hahaha..

SEE!! I told you we just can't stop taking photos!

bronson and me gay pic! hahaha..

goodnight all! i miss you hannah.. when you are back we go phuture again, but with 'ON' people ah!!!!!!

Fri, 27 Jun 2008 10:38:35 GMT

I AM GOING TO ORCHARD FOR DINNER!!

I got a surprise for karmen! haha..
i asked karmen's eye candy bronson along also! hahaha.
it'll be very fun later! (:

total i have spent $277 on my stupid left foot.. i haven buy the stuffs to dress my wound, so final cost is yet to be released! haha..

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 23:45:11 GMT

since you have gave up,
there is nothing more i can do.
think it's time for me to give up!
all the best for whatever you do in life,
take care and may you find the one for you!

now is 7.38am, i am going to be late for school.. bcos i am going to the doctor to change my dressing for my wound.. haha! not that im lazy to change my own dressing, but it's really very hard to 'wrap' it! haha.. those who have seen it will know it!

ahhhh, damn it! this saturday can't work...
sorry eh david, pong(extra one)!
david and me can't finish our expedition! hahaha..
nvm, i try to go there find you all for awhile la! haha

seriously, it's unbearable.
don't wish and don't want!
Aldrin, NO! you must let go!
goodbye to YOU!

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 09:10:10 GMT

i didn't go to school today.
was having fever and sore throat.
woke up 9+ and went to the doctor at 10+!
end up, i removed the warts on my left feet too..

so now i got more than 15 holes on my left feet.. haha!
sorry if you find it gross..
total it cost $247!!!!

this time there is no one who is there for me.
i need a support!
nvm, i shall be strong and go thru this by myself!
i shall walk by myself, bear all the pain by myself!
sorry for being so emo eh.. can't help it! hahaha.

the one i want the most,
is confused.
patience is the key to success,
can it work here?